When His Plan Hurts

This week I’m taking a break from the past to talk about the present…

I had breakdown in the car. I was sitting in the school parking lot, waiting on Kennedi’s bus to return from her volleyball team’s playoff game.

She had already informed me that they lost. As I sat in the car, I texted my mother the outcome and that the season was over. Her response? A crying emoji stating Kennedi didn’t even get a chance to play. I hadn’t even thought about that. I was just happy to get a break from the 30-minute commute I had been making for the last 2+ months.

And then it hit me. With all the praying, all the believing, all the faith-filled words and encouragement I had shared with her since August, what we were believing for didn’t even happen.

We sincerely believed that she would be miraculously healed on OUR timeline, that she would make a triumphant return to the court, and that God would get all the glory for this astonishing outcome.

I needed something to blame. It was the insurance’s fault! If only they had approved the brace in a timely manner, we wouldn’t have had over a month’s delay in therapy and progress. But no, I had called this delay in her favor numerous times while we waited. And there’s no guarantee that the outcome would have been different had the brace been ordered and approved expeditiously.

When I reached out to my husband to lament, he gently reminded me that it’s not about the battles, it’s about winning the war. And that we would not sacrifice short term benefits for her long-term gain.

I continued to meditate, and today’s Play Prediction came to mind. Kennedi was my daughter, but she was God’s child first. He already knew every single plan for the rest of her life. His plans were to prosper her with a purpose-filled future, and not to harm her.

This revelation didn’t stop the tears, but it did give them new meaning. I tried to clean my face while she approached the car, but she could still tell that I had been crying. I honestly shared my feelings with her, and she admitted that she had also cried after the game for the same reason.

I responded that we were human, and it was OK to feel that way, but we had to understand that playing her freshman year was just not in His plans, even though it was a big part of ours. And that God had something amazing in store for her down the road, and it would be worth what she’s going through now.

So alas, mine were not meant to be, but I still trust in God’s amazing plan. As big as the plans and dreams I have for Kennedi’s life, I’m reminding that He’s able to do exceeding and abundantly above even those (Ephesians 3:20).

I’m excited to see how everything will unfold, and I’m so grateful for this promise, even while not knowing how her story will play out.

To follow Kennedi’s story, continue the next blog here.

CLOSING CHALLENGE:

What plans in your life are not playing out the way you wanted or dreamed? Can you trust that if things didn’t happen the way you wanted, there is a reason for that? Do you believe that God has an amazing future already planned for you? Do you trust in Him enough to release your own plans and accept His?

Feel free to share your response in the comments section…

 

 

 

9 thoughts on “When His Plan Hurts

    1. Choosing not to look at it as a disappointment but as a part of the plan and ultimately surrendering to Him. I needed that reminder.

      Like

      1. Sheera, I would not pretend to say this is an easy task. I have to continually remind myself that HE is in control. And with that reassurance, I’m able to re-center myself and trust in His plan.

        Like

  1. You plaaaaaayyyy waaaaay too much! I hate to be selfish but I am so grateful for your walk. You keep a right now word in your back pocket. Quick to whip it out at a moment’s notice. As I meet a new daughter in me, a daughter who has to be the caretaker. I look forward to these Destined for the Dub. Can you get a monthly standard speaking engagement at the Tab?

    Like

    1. Amen! Thank you for your continued encouragement – it means so much. It can be scary to be vulnerable at times, but I pray my testimony will encourage and inspire others on their journey.

      And that would be nice!! Maybe a monthly Bible Study series or something…

      Like

  2. Wow. Thank you! I was just having this conversation with God last night. I landed a large editing contract that was set to start mid-November. But, the client withdrew last night. And, even though, initially I was anticipating this work, when I found out, I had such a peace in my heart because I knew that if I’m not doing it, it must be that He has other plans for me- better plans. His plans always trump mine. Not only am I okay with that, but I’m also grateful for it.

    Like

    1. Oh Giselle! I’m so glad to hear of your response. That’s how we know we are growing in our faith – when our path goes left, and we don’t have a major breakdown. We just remember who we serve, and remind ourselves that He knows something that we don’t, and it must not have been a part of HIS plan for our future. It can still sting a bit, but peace that passes all our understand eventually takes care of that. Can’t wait to hear about the new opportunity that is on the way!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s